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Excuse me, sir?


Is this your bag? Greeeaaaat. Can you fill out this card so we don't lose it? Thaaaaanks... Oh my, Achmed Mohammed al-Jazeera Jihad, boy, that's a long one. Family name? Great. Mine too. Alice. Yes, really. I mean who names their kid Alice anymore, right? Just my Mom and Dad. Ha! You're right, Flo would have been worse. I never thought of that...Woooow. So OK, two bags to somewhere in Europe. Did you pack them yourself? Oh I knoooooow, such a stupid question. Still, you can never be too careful Mr. Jihad, the environment out there is just so darn mean. Oh boy, these are heavy, what's in them? Lots of batteries? Mr Jihad you're making me blush...buh-bye now!

Ooops, Mr Jihad, don't forget your knife!

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money money


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The first day of school


Skippy will hop on the bus today for the first time and head off to school. He will learn all sorts of cool things on the bus. Things that, unlike the things you learn in actual school, can never be un-learned.

I'm very sad.

For the past five years I have had Skippy here with me while I worked. Then pre-school happened, but I was still able to pick him up sometimes and we'd have lunch. I made him quesadillas and grilled cheese, ham and cheese roll-ups and peanut butter and jelly. He'd sit on the floor and play legos or just talk non-stop for hours.


I'm really sad.

Now I have this

Instead of this

And this

And this

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Thanks for all the lovely email


So while I was in New Jersey and logged in to my freaking gmail account, someone in China (obviously a really close friend of mine, since they had my password, right? Right?) logged into my account and sent a shit-ton of SPAM to my contacts list. And since I don't clean my contacts, that means a million people I haven't talked to in years got spam from my account. Seriously Google, it would have been nice if you had told me that my account may have been compromised by the Red Chinese in an attempt to corner the very valuable Macbook pro market and hasten the fall of the Free World. Bastards.

Also, if you got SPAM from me and don't remember who I am, don't freakin' email me. If I wanted people I don't know or remember to talk to me I'd be on Facebook instead of Blogger.

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