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11/29/2011

Elvis Costello: Don't Buy My $225 Box Set

It's not often that I'll support an artist who's put himself out there to prop up some cause or another... but I can totally get behind not buying an Elvis Costello box set. How should we spread the word? A bumper sticker on your Subaru? "Don't buy Elvis Costello -- Pretentious Music Lovers with Pretentious Cars Against Pretentious Music" How about a magnetic penis for your early 90's Jetta?

We'll call our group: Occupy Shitty Pretentious Crap Music That Only Music Reviewers For Shitty Magazines, Aging Bartenders, People Who Use the Word "Installation" Instead Of "Exhibition", Forty-Year-Old Dickheads Who Make A Big Deal About Not Owning A Television But Spend Hours In Front Of YouTube Watching Children's Cartoons Like "Rugrats" And Justify Forcing The "Superfriends" Box Set On Their Nieces And Nephews Because Of The "Subversive" Gay Subtext, And Muzak Programmers For Starbucks, Target And Unemployed Music Buyers For Borders Books Will Ever Listen To. Or Occupy... Hey, That Bon Jovi CD In My Car Is An Ironic Statement, I'm Only Listening To It For A Laugh... or Assholes, for short.

I think I won't buy the Talking Heads Box Set, the Patti Smith Box Set any Springsteen, Paul Simon, post-heroin Lou Reed, anything with "Acoustic" in the title, just to start... we'll overcome BABY!
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